It's not short for Aaliyah, as far as I know

Alright, Lea, here's my first life lesson for you, uncle to niece: If you ever get stuck at work until 2 a.m. because of a city planners' meeting, keep some Airheads or even some Jessie Spano Memorial Caffeine Pills in a drawer.

That's right, folks, the man who tied his shoes wrong all the way through college is now an uncle. My lovely sister and her lucky husband gave birth yesterday, though only one of them described feeling as though she had been "hit by a bus." (The other one, unfortunately, felt that way a few weeks ago courtesy of a Yadier Molina home run.)

I'm so happy for them. I just wish I didn't live 700 miles away. But hopefully when the kid's old enough to be properly spoiled, we won't be too far apart.

Baby pictures? I've filed my request with the proper authorities. You'll get 'em when I do.